Do you have little or no people you can truly call friends? Were you accused or suspect yourself being annoying? Do people try to avoid conversations with you, or when they do face you, do they try to keep the talk as short as possible?
Never fear – we all dislike being thought of as annoying and/or boring, but there are things you can do to greatly remedy the situation. Bear in mind that this guide is written for those people who suspect that they’re being disliked by someone else.
- Have a wide range of interests. People who are interested in only a couple of things make difficult conversation partners. Just imagine of all the interesting things you could be talking: movies, TV shows, history, politics, religion, cooking, recipes, children, funny things that happened to you or someone else… Sky’s the limit! Write the things you can talk about, and constantly try to improve.
- Listen to the other person. Ask yourself: “Am I truly interested in what the other person has to say, or I just can’t wait to start talking again?” If the latter case, make sure to give the other person some breathing and talking space. Take into account what they said when you start talking.
- Don’t be overbearing. If you saw someone today, there is usually no need to hit that person up on a social network, smartphone app, e-mail or landline. Unless you have to, wait a couple of days to contact the person.
- You don’t have to congratulate everything. You may think that birthday or wedding anniversary would be a perfect time to get in touch with the person who wasn’t that prone to conversing with you, but to the other party, you’re just waiting for the opportunity to converse with them. Congratulate only people you’re close with, and those people who showed you the same courtesy when you were the one celebrating.
- Introduce a three week rule. Don’t want to seem like a stalker? Three week rule to the rescue – make sure you contact people who haven’t contacted you no more than once in three weeks. This will ensure that you don’t look desperate for company.
- Let it go. Sometimes, we don’t click with people that we’d really like to click with. Let that person go – and be sure that if they have a shed of interest in you, they’ll make the next move. Concentrate on people you know or getting to know new people.
- Don’t idealize. When we’re infatuated with someone, we tend to idealize them. That can be a huge mistake – we will get disproportionately disappointed by that person sooner or later. Check your motives – if you’d really, really like to hang out with someone, or become their love interest, just wait; the infatuation balloon tends to deflate quickly.